From initiative success to maintenance metrics, or return on investment, measurements are flexible.
Every now and then I take time to reflect. I think today I will share some of my thoughts with you.
Random business thoughts
They say that 70% of initiatives fail. I think this number is relative and depends on how you define what success is for the initiative. If I define success as selling an organization on the project and the project gets launched, wouldn’t that mean 100% of initiatives are a success?
They say, “An optimist will tell you the glass is half-full; the pessimist, half-empty; and the engineer will tell you the glass is twice the size it needs to be,” but does the engineer’s wife tell him to put a coaster under the glass?
If we measure something to improve, why do we measure the same things for years to never see any improvement?
When you clean, really you are just transferring the dirt to another object, making it dirty. If we truly seek to be clean, how do we end the perpetual loop of transferring dirt from one object to another?
Because in a Matrix organization most people answer to multiple people, is it called a Matrix organization because everyone dodges bullets, and no one gets hit? Makes sense since accountability really does not exist, because if everyone is accountable then no one is accountable.
Is inadequate preparation just a politically correct way of saying incompetent?
Because by some definitions, predictive maintenance and condition-based maintenance are interchangeable. If I use a chain wear gauge to check the condition of a chain, am I doing predictive maintenance?
Since most maintenance best practices are defined through metrics, does it matter how we get there?
If the key to success is hitting the floor and doing the work necessary, why do people think that buying software is a solution to offsetting the work?
If you need a return on investment to justify the need of a project, why is it never measured after the fact to see if the project actually achieved the promised savings sold to the organization?
Sarcasm is a way to slap people without a physical altercation.
If you sit in the middle in an airplane, which armrest is yours?
Isn’t clapping just beating ourselves to show our approval?
If the definition of insanity is making the same mistakes over and over again, expecting a different outcome, are most of us truly insane?
Is convenience just a better way of saying lazy?
If you thoroughly enjoy wasting time, is it really time wasted?
To save plastic from entering the environment, we went from plastics straws and cardboard cups to cardboard straws and plastic cups. Am I missing something?
They say the enemy of your enemy is your friend. If I am my own worst enemy, that would make me my enemies’ enemy, so am I my friend as well?
Is a random act of kindness really random if you intended on doing it?
What would it be like if a mistake was made playing leapfrog with a unicorn?
Why do we fight fire with fire when water works better?
When we fall down the stairs and no one saw it, why do we still get embarrassed?
Why do we use the word “educated” to describe someone? It does not mean they are intelligent. Big difference.
Why do you have to prove to a bank that you do not need the money when you go get a loan? Doesn’t that defeat the purpose?
Why is everything funny until it happens to you?
Hope you enjoyed some random thoughts. If you have any random thoughts to share, send us an email.
About the Author: The Captain
Captain Unreliability is a satire of the state of the manufacturing industry in ’Merica today and is written by an industry professional known for using humor to get the point across. Stay tuned for more useless advice, and if you have topics you’d like to see covered or questions you’d like The Captain to weigh in on, contact The Captain directly at [email protected] or follow on Twitter @CUnreliability. Also, consider becoming Unreliable today by getting your Captain t-shirt at https://reliabilityx.com/product-category/gear.
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